{"id":520,"date":"2006-12-02T14:12:00","date_gmt":"2006-12-02T14:12:00","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.nolligan.co.uk\/SU\/?p=520"},"modified":"2006-12-02T14:12:00","modified_gmt":"2006-12-02T14:12:00","slug":"monologues-at-make-em-laugh","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"http:\/\/www.nolligan.ie\/SU\/monologues-at-make-em-laugh\/","title":{"rendered":"Monologues at Make Em Laugh!"},"content":{"rendered":"

http:\/\/www.monologues.co.uk\/<\/a><\/p>\n


\n<\/a>
\n
\n<\/a>
\n
\n<\/a>
\n
\n<\/a><\/p>\n

THE BALLAD OF THE WOGGLER’S MOOLY*
\n(Kenneth Williams)<\/b><\/b><\/center><\/p>\n

Joe, he was a young cordwangler,
\nMunging greebles he did go,
\nAnd he loved a bogler’s daughter
\nBy the name of Chiswick Flo.<\/p>\n

Vain she was and like a grusset
\nThough her gander parts were fine,
\nBut she sneered at his cordwangle
\nAs it hung upon the line.<\/p>\n

So he stole a woggler’s mooly
\nFor to make a wedding ring,
\nBut the Bow Street Runners caught him
\nAnd the judge said “He will swing.”<\/p>\n

Oh, they hung him by the postern,
\nNailed his mooly to the fence
\nFor to warn all young cordwanglers
\nThat it was a grave offence.<\/p>\n

There’s a moral to this story,
\nThough your cordwangle be poor,
\nKeep your hands off other’s moolies,
\nFor it is against the law.<\/p>\n

*A mooly is a sort of smoked cuttlefish of the whelk family, or a brother-in-law you might say.<\/p>\n

Nowadays you can get them frozen and pre-woggled, but they don’t taste the same.<\/i>
\n


\n
\n<\/a><\/p>\n

Hear All, See All, Say Nowt<\/b>
\n Recorded by Sandy Powell 1939<\/center><\/p>\n

Hear all, see all, say nowt,
\nEat all, drink all, pay nowt.
\nIt’s a long time remember
\nfrom January to December
\nSo hear all, see all, say nowt,
\nEat all, sup all, pay nowt
\nAnd if ever thy does owt fer nowt
\nAlways do it fer th’sen.<\/p>\n

When I was a right young lad
\nMe father said t’me
\nSeems to me thy’s growin’ up
\nNow what’s thy goin’ t’be?
\nIt all depends upon th’self
\nIt’s only up to thee
\nI won’t say much to you again
\nBut take this tip from me…<\/p>\n

Hear all, see all, say nowt,
\nEat all, drink all, pay nowt.
\nIt’s a long time remember
\nfrom January to December
\nSo hear all, see all, say nowt,
\nEat all, sup all, pay nowt
\nAnd if ever thy does owt fer nowt
\nAlways do it fer th’sen.<\/p>\n

Save thy pennies while thy can
\nAnd just do what I say,
\nIf thy doesn’t keep thy ‘ead
\nTha’ll ‘ave some brass one day.
\nIt all depends upon th’self
\nIt’s only up to thee
\nBut there’s one thing thy can reckon on
\nThy won’t get owt from me.<\/p>\n


\n
\n<\/a>
<\/center><\/center><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

http:\/\/www.monologues.co.uk\/ THE BALLAD OF THE WOGGLER’S MOOLY* (Kenneth Williams) Joe, he was a young cordwangler, Munging greebles he did go, And he loved a bogler’s daughter By the name of Chiswick Flo. Vain she was and like a grusset Though … Continue reading →<\/span><\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_crdt_document":"","_monsterinsights_skip_tracking":false,"_monsterinsights_sitenote_active":false,"_monsterinsights_sitenote_note":"","_monsterinsights_sitenote_category":0,"footnotes":""},"categories":[3],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-520","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-wordpress2blogger"],"aioseo_notices":[],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.nolligan.ie\/SU\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/520","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.nolligan.ie\/SU\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.nolligan.ie\/SU\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.nolligan.ie\/SU\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.nolligan.ie\/SU\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=520"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"http:\/\/www.nolligan.ie\/SU\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/520\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.nolligan.ie\/SU\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=520"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.nolligan.ie\/SU\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=520"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.nolligan.ie\/SU\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=520"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}